How Depression Sparked my Tarot Creativity & led to Healing:
Blood, Bread & Roses tarot
"Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that centers on the inability to manage emotions effectively. "
Borderline & Tarot
A tarot journey of understanding and healing, representing and reflecting darker issues of life, with moments of whimsy. A true reflection of my own state of mind this past year that altered between weeping and wit.
So the predominant themes of this tarot deck tackle issues of sexuality, feminism, & mental health. Although following closely to the Rider-Waite-Smith tarot system, it at times shows the darker and more cynical aspects.
I am a Tarot Reader of 30 years and a single mother of 3 children and this year I turned 50. I also struggled this year with depression and the accumulated angst of years of untreated Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
What is BPD? According the the National Education for Borderline Personality Disorder www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com:
"Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness that centers on the inability to manage emotions effectively. The disorder occurs in the context of relationships: sometimes all relationships are affected, sometimes only one. It usually begins during adolescence or early adulthood.
While some persons with BPD are high functioning in certain settings, their private lives may be in turmoil. Most people who have BPD suffer from problems regulating their emotions and thoughts, impulsive and sometimes reckless behavior, and unstable relationships.
Other disorders, such as depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders, substance abuse and other personality disorders can often exist along with BPD."
During the darkest moments of my winter, I turned to tarot and it was an anchor in the darkness that brought me through the worst of my thoughts, and distracted me from suicidal thoughts, and self-harming behaviours that I used as a coping mechanism. During this time I decided that I wanted to go deeper into my understanding and study of tarot, and decided to study each card in depth and try and collate images to recreate each card's meaning.
This is the Blood Bread & Roses Tarot I have created and am selling on this site. I called the deck "Blood, Bread & Roses" after the groundbreaking book by Judy Grahn, whom I read in my early 20's and whose book was so influential in my feminism and understanding of the women's spirituality movement, and sexuality. So it felt right to do so.
In many ways this deck is a snapshot in time of a mood and state of mind, but it's perspective although rooted in the shadow side of life, is one I imagine or at least hope others may relate to. The deck is digital collage, and I scoured the internet for images that spoke to me, and reflected an aspect of each card's meaning. Often times, the meaning reflected is the shadow aspect of that card, and so the imagery may be triggering for some, and uncomfortable for others.
The deck does not shy away from nudity or issues of sexuality, nor does it sugar coat mental health, with several cards speaking to my reality of that experience at least, and maybe yours as well. It also reflects my politics and social justice concerns, and in doing so turned some card meanings on it's head. And as much as possible I strived to be inclusive of gender, age, sexual orientation and ethnicity.
I am not a graphic designer, I am not a visual artist, although I am an a trained dancer, actor and musician, with a passion for all artforms. In fact I had to learn the program while I was doing this process.
But this focused attention and learning curve was beneficial in giving me meaning and a reason to get up in the morning. It was very crucial in my recovery I strongly believe.
So I decided to take a leap of faith, and like the Fool in the Tarot, I jumped off the cliff and just went for it and got the decks printed up. It was the fulfillment and completion of a process of recovery and the satisfaction of that culmination was very healing.
I also put myself into this deck, as I am the Devil in a red dress depicted on the Devil card along with other personal elements peppering the deck throughout. I have embodied in the past the struggles of The Devil card, and so it felt empowering to place myself in that role, and in so doing view myself and the implications of the card from a safe distance.
Tarot if nothing else, is a powerful tool for personal enlightenment and transformation. For additional content, and tarot related stuff, follow me on Facebook and Instagram. And for Tarot Readings and other indie tarot decks, see my store at freyjasdaughter.com my Etsy Store at freyjasdaughter.etsy.com
BLOOD, BREAD & ROSES TAROT
Independent tarot deck, and a digital collage creation expressing the shadow side of life and tarot, with aspects of whimsy. This is not a deck for the faint of heart, as it addresses issues of social justice, sex-positive femininism, and mental health.
The images are evocative and at times triggering, but they are powerful and spark the intuitive mind.
It has a good balance of light and dark aspects, as well as a broad representation of ethnicities, ages, and body shapes and sizes. It also is LGBTQ positive and has cards that can be exchanged to suit the gender and sexual identity of the reader or querent.
Deck is available to ship worldwide.
HERMIT'S CAVE REVIEW
Youtube review of both my tarot decks including the Blood, Bread & Roses Tarot. Thank-you to Simon of Hermit's Cave for taking the time to review my decks and for the kind words and enthusiasm.
Check out my independent self-published tarot decks available for sale
Vintage Erotic Tarot
The Vintage Erotic Tarot is a 82 card deck using vintage erotic photography from the late 19th century and early 20th century. It is black and white photography or sepia toned photography of vintage erotic models, put into a digital collage art deck representing each...
Blood, Bread & Roses Tarot
Independent tarot deck, a digital collage creation expressing the shadow side of life and tarot, with aspects of whimsy. This is not a deck for the faint of heart, as it addresses issues of social justice, sex-positive femininism, and mental health. The images...
& Boutique Tarot
Freyja’s Daughter is a Tarot Boutique offering in-depth tarot consultations & exclusive tarot decks. Wilma is a professional Tarot Consultant who offers irreverent yet intuitive tarot readings with humour and compassion for the spiritual seeker in search of wisdom. Also selling independent self-published artist created tarot decks for the discerning tarot enthusiast and collector. Tarot for the handmade market.